It seems that everyone has an excuse for failing a drug
test. Whether it be because of PMS like
Hope Solo or that you didn’t realize your brownie was laced with pot like Nick Delpopolo or even because you made out with a cocaine riddled chick in Miami
like Richard Gasquet, everyone has a reason why they broke the rules. So to help you stay one step ahead of your ruling
body here are a few ideas as to why you were caught with an illegal substance
in your system:
There was PEDs in my delta airlines sandwich. Damn you terrorists!
 |
| Just Jared |
It was a gift from my hookup with Pauly D at the Jersey Shore house. #yeahbuddy
Thought I was taking my thyroid medication, turns out it was
anabolic steroids. That was one scary
sleep driving incident.
Jeremy Renner gave me something on a transatlantic flight. Should have known it was no good
for me after he asked if I was interested in joining the mile high club.
Thought I’d go Dennis and Dee and take some to get on
welfare. Hard out here for a pimp.
The barrista at Starbucks was upset that I didn’t tip him
last week so he spiked my latte.
I trusted Amanda Bynes…but not enough to get in a car with
her.
What…that is not allowed?
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